Just Because You Can Doesn’t Mean You Should

and if you can’t…then don’t.

If you aren’t where you want to be in life, it may be because you are still in process and just need to be patient.

Or it may be that where you want to be in life does not align with how God made you.

I learned this when I came dangerously close to burning out a few years ago.

I felt immense pressure to become the version of a leader others would consider “successful” in ministry.

No single person put this pressure on me, but I felt it all the same as I saw how other pastors led and wanted to be like them.

The version I pursued did not align with my unique identity in Christ.

And that was a BIG problem.

The more I would strive to become something that wasn’t within me to be, the more it sucked the life out of me.

And it left me on the verge of burnout.

I don’t think this is just a problem for those serving in ministry. I think this problem is everywhere and impacts everyone.

You and I live in a world that lifts success as the ultimate goal of life.

Career success, marriage success, parenting success, even successful retirement planning…the pressure to be successful is everywhere.

Except success feels like a moving target.

Every time you arrive at your goal and achieve what you thought success was, you look around and see there is another level and another person who has achieved what you have not.

The temptation to feel less than is MASSIVE.

So you push towards whatever you think “next” is in your career, marriage, parenting, retirement planning, or life.

And, look, there is nothing inherently wrong with progressing towards the best version of life for yourself and your family.

But it only really works when that version of life is God’s version.

In Psalm 16, David acknowledges that there were “successful” people that he initially admired.

But when he watched them chasing after other gods and the path that led them down, he wanted no part of it or them.

He saw that the one true God was his “portion” – the source of his life and the security of his legacy. His only desire was for that which passed through this God’s hand and into his life.

Operating from this mindset led to feelings of gratitude, joy, rest, and stability, trusting that God was always present with him and was instructing him in the way of true life.

While the people of David’s day chased after gods in the spiritual realm, the false gods tempting you and I are of the physical realm.

The gods of wealth, power, and influence – the gods of success – want your life to revolve around them and demand striving beyond your capacity to receive what they offer.

But what they offer is never what you actually receive.

When you believe that God is instructing you, that God is at your side, and that God is the source of your life and the security of your legacy, you won’t need to strive beyond your capacity to arrange for your life.

Centering your life on the promises and priorities of God in Christ will open the door to the opportunities for growth you can handle.

Stepping into those opportunities will produce feelings of gratitude, joy, rest, and stability because they will align with who you were created to be.

That doesn’t mean you should be complacent. It just means that you stop looking for the next step because the next move of God could take you ten steps.

I’ll give you an example:

For the last few years, I have been fortunate to build a profitable coaching and consulting practice as a side hustle.

The activity has ebbed and flowed, and there have been times when I wanted to build it bigger than the opportunities facing me would create.

Each time I have felt the temptation to strive further, the Spirit has reminded me of my capacity and that I’ve never needed to manufacture opportunities.

See, it wasn’t really me that built it.

Most of my clients came as I walked through doors God had clearly opened. And when business would decline, it coincided with seasons where I needed to lean more heavily into times of rest.

There are steps I could take right now to build a bigger business, but what it would cost me would be beyond my current capacity and lead me right back into a place of burnout.

And that is somewhere I never want to be again.

God may open the door for more opportunities to coach and consult. Or not.

I am at peace either way because I want the life God has for me, not something I have to strive for because someone or something else told me I should want.

As you walk with the Spirit instructing you in every area of your life, you are at your best when you listen to words of grace and look for open doors.

You can do so with trust in the same promise David clung to, that God is present and teaching you how to become the best version of yourself.

Just because you “can” do something doesn’t mean you should.

And whatever you can’t do, don’t – and don’t feel less than because you can’t.

It may not be who you are…or it just might not be time yet.

Instead, embrace the words of Jesus, who promises that when you seek first His Kingdom and righteousness, everything else begins to fall into place.